Susan & Oishi Meet Anghelito, Angelusito, and Demonyito (Part 1) 😇 😈

🕊️ Narrated by: Kap Angel

“¡Como están todos! I’m Kap Angel, your heavenly narrator for today—so buckle up and maybe say a little prayer.”

Now, you’re probably wondering:

“Why is this charming uncle-angel narrating instead of the loud hooman and her judgmental Shih Tzu?”

Valid question.

Let’s rewind to the incident at Heaven’s kitchen.

Scene 1: The Great Lechon War

It all began with two angels — Anghelito and Angelusito — fighting over the last piece of lechon.

(Yes, lechon. Don’t ask. It’s heaven. We have range.)

The tug-of-war got so intense that the meat flew into the air, hit the ceiling, and knocked the coffee machine off balance. Again.

These two?

Always doing harmless but highly annoying things.

Yesterday, Angelusito took the last muffin and ate it in slow motion in front of Anghelito.

So naturally, Anghelito drank Angelusito’s glass of water…

…which caused a dramatic choking fit and a surprise trip to the heavenly clinic.

Sometimes I ask the Boss why these two are still up here.

But then again, our Boss is love. And also… justice.

So I did what every Kap would do:

I tattled. 😇

Scene 2: Judgment Daylight

We stood before the Almighty.

Too majestic to describe. So I just… humbly explained the mess.

And then, God spoke.

“One of the greatest commandments is to love your neighbor as yourself…”

“But you two? You keep fighting over muffins and meat.”

Angelusito gasped dramatically — Heaven’s WIFI glitched for a second.

“As a lesson,” God continued, “you will be sent down to look after Susan and Oishi.”

I nodded solemnly.

They begged for a different assignment.

Then Father God added “I love them as I love all my creation. My Son have met them. Honestly… they’re just like you two”

Scene 3: Jesus’ Farewell Speech

At the gate, just before takeoff, Jesus appeared.

“Anghelito, Angelusito… you’re going to a broken world.”

“You’ll experience injustice, discouragement, maybe even get mocked — like they did to Me.”

“You’ll face doubt. And it’ll sting.”

Angelusito raised his hand:

“Lord, can You convince Father God to let us stay?”

Jesus smiled.

“The decision’s made. But I will be with you — always. Even in the darkest valley.”

“Encourage them. Be good to them. And if their attitude makes you want to scream…”

“Remember… I died for them.”

Oof. That one always lands.

Kap Angel’s Notes on the Duo

• Anghelito: Pilot. Stoic. Loves Jesus but doesn’t laugh when God tells jokes.

Later that day, he told me the Lord’s joke was hilarious and that he “almost cried.”

• Angelusito: Overthinker. Sweet, but too caught up in details.

One time, an angel sprained her wing, and instead of helping, he debated which type of bandage was best for 15 minutes.

Anyway. Off they went. Assigned to Susan and Oishi. Heaven help us.

Cut to Earth — Oishi Narrates (Grumpily)

It was a regular Saturday. I was minding my own business when I saw Susan holding a frying pan… headed to the bathroom.

I thought, “Oh no, not this again.”

She looked at me, did that weird “I see you, you see me” military hand signal, and whispered,

“Oishi, I hear noises in the toilet. Must be a rat.”

We crept closer. She turned the knob slowly…

And then—boom.

There was a tiny demon with a plunger.

Just standing there.

“Greetings, hooman and dog,” he said.

(Excuse me? Dog? I’m a BABY.) 🤬

“I’m Demonyito,” he announced. “I’m here to make your lives mildly inconvenient until your patience collapses!”

“You’ll feel annoyed… fed up… then you’ll snap!”

“You’ll be rude to others, bark at your friends, and BOOM — you’ve forgotten kindness. That’s how I win.”

Then he threw the plunger at the faucet, flooded the bathroom, and bolted out laughing like a possessed karaoke machine.

Susan screamed. I barked.

To be continued…🐾😇😈